Lifetime learning is an important value to me. I hope to be learning up until my very last breath. After all, when that happens I will never have taken my last breath before, so that will be a new experience!

So with 58 years of learning, doing new things, and trying new experiences, you’d think I would have grown a lot.

Hmm… maybe? Maybe not?

I mean, yes, definitely, I am growing and learning every day. My understanding of the world and of other people and of myself expands with every interaction I have. My mind is open (mostly) and I try to change for the better (mostly). I actively seek out learning and growth opportunities, like the Lifetime Trusted Advisor program and mastermind that just wrapped up its 2025 cohort.

But this weekend I read something that made me think I maybe haven’t grown at all in the last 53 years.

My parents visited me in Oregon from the East Coast last week, and they brought a few things they’d excavated from the many boxes that had been stored in their garage for decades.

I mean, literally decades. Some of those boxes were moved from Connecticut to California in 1984 and then back to Connecticut in 1987… still sealed with the same tape.

One of those boxes included two books I wrote in fifth grade. (I might write about that in the future, but here’s the backstory if you’re interested.)

The box also included some of my earliest report cards. The one that caught my eye was this report from my kindergarten teacher in 1973. To get a sense of how long ago that was, it was the same year Roe v Wade was originally decided. It was also the year the US withdrew from the Vietnam war.

So… a long time ago.

This letter says some things about five-year-old Peter that ring shockingly true for 58-year-old Peter. Things like

• a very healthy curiosity, pride in well accomplished work, and and interest in new and challenging things
• very secure mastery of all Kindergarten-covered readiness skills
• a very good listener… also a seldom contributor
• has a very good vocabulary and interest in the world around him
• likes stories, art, and physical education activities

Also

• has been a very shy, quiet class member with a hesitant approach, at times
• hesitant to participate in rhythms and music parts of the program
• kept mostly to the company of two friends

All of these things are generally mostly still true, though “company of two friends” has grown to include a lot more than just two, and I like to think I contribute more these days. Also, there was a period in my young adulthood when you could not stop me from dancing.

I call this letter a treasure because it’s rare to have such source material. When we as adults work on ourselves, we often try to excavate and interrogate our childhoods. What made me the way I am today? How did I act and interact with others as a child? What formative influences shaped me back then?

Our memories are suspect under the best of conditions. It’s impossible to keep our adult lenses from distorting the truth of those memories to fit the narratives that form our current worldview. More often we deceive ourselves by shaping past events to fit the way our current egos demand they must have happened.

For me, the greatest treasure in this kindergarten report card is that it shows a playful, curious, competent person who is also shy and hesitant to participate. As an adult, I don’t like being shy or hesitant to participate, but I often am. I find it reassuring that it’s not entirely a failure of being a courageous adult leader (which I like to think of myself as) but it’s also endemic to the child I was.

What do I do with this information? I’m not sure yet, but I can already feel it working on me in some little ways.

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