New mistakes are the key to lifelong learning
The best advice I ever got was when I was nine years old. I was skiing for the first time, and my 15-year-old brother had been tasked with babysitting me on the slopes for the morning.
Frustrated at how timid and slow I was, he kept urging me to go faster. I whined that if I did, I might fall down. Finally, as I lay in the snow after fifteen or twenty feet of snowplowing, he pulled up next to me.
“If you don’t fall down,” he growled, “then you’re not having enough fun.”
We’ve all heard the old saw: If you don’t fall down, you’re not trying hard enough.
I like my brother’s version better.
The idea that you should keep working harder and harder until you injure yourself seems pretty cynical. But I can get behind the idea of pushing the envelope in pursuit of joy.
I try to live my life with that mindset.
Don’t think too much about old mistakes
I’ve made plenty of mistakes in my life. Some have had big consequences, like losing a job. Some have been avoidable. Rookie mistakes. Mistakes of hubris. Mistakes of miscommunication.
Most have been minor. All have been survivable. (So far.)
And all have taught me lessons.
I try not to fret too much about past mistakes. After all, regret is a very good liar. Anyway, I can’t undo them. I can only learn from them.
Sometimes there’s a mess to clean up, but mostly it’s a case of picking myself up, knocking the snow off my goggles, and pointing my skis downhill again.

Go make new mistakes
There are many points in life when we’re challenged by transition. Leaving home for the first time. Career changes. Marriage. Kids. Divorce. Retirement. (Or, as I prefer, starting your encore career).
All of these transition points can challenge your self-confidence. Especially as you get older, the learning curve looks bigger and the stakes seem higher. It can be so much easier, and feel so much safer, to retreat into things that are familiar.
But where’s the fun in that?
For me, the term “lifelong learner” means “someone who is not afraid to have enough fun.” That is, they are not afraid to fall down.
The point of learning from your mistakes is not to stop making mistakes. It’s so you can go out and make new mistakes.
I, for one, think it’s tremendously exciting to have so many new mistakes ahead of me!
Connect with me
Free consultation
Looking for more fulfillment, joy, or direction in your life? Want to be a more courageous leader? Contemplating a career change? Have a book in you that you need to write? I can help. Schedule a free coaching session now.
Free core values exercise
This simple worksheet helps identify your core values. Many of my clients find it surprisingly eye-opening, and it’s helped people make some big life decisions. Get it here.
Download my chapter from RELIT free

RELIT: How to Rekindle Yourself in the Darkness of Compassion Fatigue gives practical, relevant, actionable advice on avoiding and overcoming compassion fatigue and caregiver burnout. As a professional coach, I have to pay close attention to self-regulation and my own personal resilience. My chapter explains the things I do to stay centered and stay focused so I can give every client my best, every time.
Download my chapter for free: Show up. Try hard. Be nice.
0 Comments